Eric Schwartz - Houston, We Have A Problem (Shaving Off My Muff For You)

Your birthday is coming

Don’t worry, I’m aware

I’ve been trying to find you something

Just to show how much I care

But I just couldn't tell

'Til I bought that Mademoiselle

Now I know just what I’m gonna do

Now I’m shavin' off my muff for you



‘'cause lately when you love me

You've seemed a little cross

And then after, when you're brushing

You refuse the dental floss

Even when it was mint

But I can take a hint

Now the only question's one blade or two

When I’m shavin' off my muff for you



My friends keep axin' "girl, haven’t you tried waxin’?"

“Or that depilatory cream”

My ex-friend Katie lent me her Epilady

And I found out how loud I could screeeeeeeemmmm



Now there's gonna be stubble

But darlin', duty calls

So get down there on the double

If you want to keep your balls

‘'cause I scraped and I scratched

Even had to pluck a patch

'cause even my Mach Three wouldn't do

When I’m shavin' off my muff

Shavin' off my muff

Shavin off my muff for you



("Self Bootleg" BONUS VERSE)

No other woman is gonna shave as close

Now my little box of funk

Looks like a Buddhist Monk

And not like no Chasidic Jew

Now that I’m shavin off my muff

Shavin' off my muff

Shavin off my muff for you










		
			



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