Oliver - Oom-Pah-Pah

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CHAIRMAN 





(spoken) Ladies and gentlemen, brethren and sinners all! I call upon our Goddess of the Virtues to give us her well known rendition of the old school song -- Oom-Pah-Pah! 





NANCY 





(spoken) All right, shut up, you lot! A bit of culture now! 'Ere we go... 





(sung) There's a little ditty


They're singing in the city


Espeshly when they've been


On the gin


Or the beer


If you've got the patience, 


Your own imaginations


Will tell you just exactly what you want to hear... 





ALL 





Oom-pah-pah! Oom-pah-pah!


That's how it goes, 


Oom-pah-pah! Oom-pah-pah!


Ev'ryone knows. 





NANCY 





They all suppose what they want to suppose


When they hear...oom-pah-pah!! 





Mister Percy Snodgrass


Would often have the odd glass -- 


But never when he thought anybody could see.


Secretly he'd buy it,


And drink it on the quiet,


And dream he was an Earl


Wiv a girl on each knee! 





CUSTOMERS AND NANCY 





Oom-pah-pah! Oom-pah-pah!


That's how it goes.


Oom-pah-pah! Oom-pah-pah!


Ev'ryone knows... 





NANCY 





What is the cause of his red shiny nose?


Could it be...oom-pah-pah!? 





Pretty little Sally


Goes walking down the alley,


Displays her pretty ankles to all of the men.


They could see her garters,


But not for free-and-gratis--


An inch or two, and then she knows


When to say when! 





ALL 





Oom-pah-pah! Oom-pah-pah!


That's how it goes.


Oom-pah-pah! Oom-pah-pah!


Ev'ryone knows... 





NANCY 





Whether it's hidden, or whether it shows --


It's the same...oom-pah-pah!


She was from the country,


But now she's up a gum-tree --


She let a feller feed 'er, then lead 'er along


What's the good o' cryin'?


She's made a bed to lie in 


She's glad to bring the coin in,


And join in this song! 





ALL 





Oom-pah-pah! Oom-pah-pah!


That's how it goes!


Oom-pah-pah!Oom-pah-pah!


Ev'ryone knows. 





NANCY 





She is no longer the same blushing rose


Ever since ... oom-pah-pah! 





(spoken) Altogether now! 





NANCY


(sung) There's a little ditty


They're singing in the city


Espeshly when they've been


On the gin


Or the beer


If you've got the patience, 


Your own imaginations


Will tell you just exactly what you want to hear... 





COMPANY


Oom-pah-pah! Oom-pah-pah!


That's how it goes, 


Oom-pah-pah! Oom-pah-pah!


Ev'ryone knows.


They all suppose what they want to suppose


When they hear...oom-pah-pah!! 


 





ALL 





Oom-pah-pah! Oom-pah-pah!


That's how it goes, 


Oom-pah-pah! Oom-pah-pah!


Ev'ryone knows. 





NANCY 





They all suppose what they want to suppose


When they hear...oom-pah-pah!! 





ALL 





Oom-pah-pah! 





 



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